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We haven’t heard about DSK for quite some time and this relative calm has allowed me to try to put things into perspective. Don’t get me wrong, I still firmly believe that the attitude of the French intelligentsia was unacceptable and you can read my previous posts here and here to understand my immediate thoughts on what has happened.

But I am now convinced that there is another collateral victim: the decent man. You see, most men are just decent, hard-working chaps who are trying to support their family or simply make a living and, on top of this, have to endure our mood swings during PMS.

Now that we know that Arnie is a cheater, Weiner an exhibitionist and DSK a potential rapist, I am reading everywhere that men will need to behave. Careful, those bad deeds will not go unpunished from now on! “Le Nouvel Observateur” (A French Political magazine) even reminds its readers of all the sexist comments made by some French politicians and personalities. I am not sure that it will help. The main issues for women are, I believe, education, affordable childcare and equality at the work place. But they are swiftly swept under the carpet. Gone with the media storm
Stigmatizing the men will not help anyone. Most men are reasonable guys. Actually, I am hugely indebted to them. Men in my family, my friends, men at my workplace. Or simply the chap who helped me the other day when my car broke down.

Normal men need to be celebrated a bit more. They are everywhere and without them, I am not sure that we would manage. And, sisters, let’s face it, if men have to analyze every word before speaking to us, it is going to be quite boring.

In short, I love men and I’d like to think that I am close to them. Very close.

Muriel – A French Yummy Mummy In London
  • Thank you for this. There IS too much male bashing due to all the shit heads out there. Not every guy is like that, just as not every woman is one way, just like not all everything is one way. It should be on a case by case examination.

  • I agree totally. I grew up with five brothers and as a consequence I have always found it easier to get on with men. As with every subject, once you begin to generalize you do many a disservice.

  • Hey Muriel,

    I respect people for who they are irrespective of what their gender is, what a few people of their category have chosen to do. For example, the recent rape cases in India is a horrendous thing when considered; but that doesn’t mean I will hate men in general. I will hate the crime, the horrendous act, not the people involved in general.

  • You know I’m loving this post. You are a truth teller. Thanks.

  • I’m glad you wrote this specifically, Muriel : “if men have to analyze every word before speaking to us, it is going to be quite boring.” I think sometimes some people take political correctness to the extreme and it has become idiotic. Anyway, yes, I love men too…well, the decent, smart ones, that is! ;-))

  • I agree completely. Far too much is being spouted about a few well-known figures/personalities misbehaving. Come on, they’re the exception and not the rule.

  • Oh, Muriel, this is AWESOME! SO TRUE! Cheers to the decent man! I know one in particular whom I adore 🙂 … sweet, kind, affectionate, totally treats me (and his daughters, well, and women in general) with the utmost of respect which is a model that all men (well, all human beings) could follow…
    total props to the decent men (and women) of the world!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • Hello Muriel –

    Your post is really very good and the similar no-gooders can spoil the decent woman/mother aslo. You said, “Normal men (Charlie’s) need to be celebrated a bit more. They are everywhere and without them (Charlie), I am not sure that we would manage. And, sisters, let’s face it, if men (Charlie’s) have to analyze every word before speaking to us, it is going to be quite boring”…hehehe. That was fun, huh?!

    Muriel, the same feelings are here with me and most men as well. We love women and quite honestly cannot live without all of you.

    You also said, “In short, I love men and I’d like to think that I am close to them. Very close.” I expect you to post my cheesecake air express and will look for it at my door step in the morning. 😛

  • I couldn’t agree more. Generalizing is never a wise thing to do. Each person is unique. It would be sad if we lumped people into a box simply because of the unfortunate actions of a few.

  • I agree that there are tons of decent men in the world and that bashing either sex is wrong. However, cheating on spouses is not a rare phenomenon. I think it is very important that women, as well as men, are respected on an individual and personal basis. Thought provoking post!

  • Nicely done Muriel, I’m with you! There’s more good apples than bad ones by far…

  • First of all, I have no mood swings. 😉 Second, I love a good guy. And unicorns. 😀 Unfortunately, the good guys don’t seem to make the headlines all that often. And unicorns? Don’t get me started…

  • Thanks for giving back credit to every day guys and celebrate them, what will we do without them really?!
    There is a bunch of good men around and their story should be told too. Great post!

    By the way, I always found it easier to be close to guys, as they don’t worry much about the appearance and just get on with things as they come.

  • Good point – it’s easy to forget they’re not all philandering, misogynistic, potential rapists! Feminism has to be careful not to tip over too far into craziness. Much though they drive us nuts sometimes, there are other times we know we couldn’t live without men.

  • Hip Hip Hurrah for the decent guys! May they grow and populate the world…monogynously that is!

  • Interesting post, its good to see women bridge the gap with men that can sometimes exist. Cool banner as well, really unique!

    Hope you can stop by my blog, click on profile…

  • Muriel, it’s never good to stereotype or to judge all men on the deeds of a few naughty men. I agree, censorship would make for very boring conversation!

  • I have six brothers and I really think they are all good guys. This a great post and nice of you to recognize the fact that all guys aren’t bad. Growing up all my best friends were always guys because to be honest i found the drama caused by teenage girls to be unbearable.

  • Couldn’t agree more – let’s celebrate the decent everyday men out there. We may (as females) use them as the butt of jokes and as scapegoats on many occasion, but I for one would be lost without the men in my life.

  • Very much in agreement here. I love men and think it’s silly to chastise the whole gender because of the ones that do those stupid acts. =)

  • Agree! (Most everyone else said what I would have, so that is all I have to offer 🙂 )

  • I absolutely loved the heartedness and positivity in this post, Muriel! =) It can be easy to focus on the negative (because they’re news-worthy and shocking) and forget all the amazing men in our lives. I’m going to make a commitment to celebrate those good in my life a little more! =)

  • Very well said, Muriel!